Get closer to your partner

New research conducted reveals the truth behind relationships in 2008 Britain. Couples have more of a relationship with TV than each other!

• Couples today devote twice as much time watching TV vs talking to each other.
• One in five couples never make love in an average week; one in ten couples don't even kiss and an astonishing one in 30 don't even talk to each other.
• Lack of sex drive is one of the top reasons why 29% of partners don't get intimate with their loved ones. While dusting and hoovering gets in the way for one in five people.
• One in seven couples admits that they are too embarrassed and one in 20 don't know what to do when it comes to getting intimate with their partner.
• One in 20 British men claim they can't get close as their partner is too fat.
• Couples spend an average of 30 minutes each week arguing - and Nottingham couples are the UK's worst.
• One in ten people is dissatisfied with their current relationship and one in 50 couples is on the brink of breaking up.
• 61% of UK couples want more physical and emotional intimacy in their relationships and one in seven say they would benefit from some help and advice.
• Top ways couples improve the intimacy in their relationships includes talking to each other, enjoying a romantic break, having a few drinks and using massage oil.

---

Help is at hand

Sexual and Relationship Psychotherapist Paula Hall gives ten top tips on restoring the intimacy within a relationship.

10 steps to greater intimacy

1. Laugh together - someone once said that laughter is to intimacy what orgasm is to sex. When we laugh, not only do we release a cocktail of feel good hormones, but we also lower our intellectual and physical defences and feel closer.

2. Do something extreme - boosting your adrenalin by doing something scary or invigorating - or better still both, will not only give you tons to talk about for days but also make your body more sexually responsive.

3. Touch regularly - many couples get out of touch with touch. Commit to a new 5-a-day rule. Any combination of holding hands, hugging, caressing, kissing, or snuggling will help improve your relationship health.

4. Get sensual - make time to enjoy your skin together. Share a bath, shower, foot rub or full body massage. Experiment with massage oils that tingle and warm, such as the new K-Y® Touch Massage 2-in-1 (K-Y® TOUCH MASSAGE® 2-in-1 Warming and Tingling are available from Boots, Superdrug, Tesco and pharmacies priced £6.99) which can also be used as a lubricant if you want!

5. Make a daily intimacy request. Take alternate days to ask your partner to do something special for you. Start with simple, manageable requests such as making a cup of tea, watching a movie together or going for a walk.

6. Go to bed earlier - agree that you'll go to bed together while you're both still awake! Share a night cap together, a cup of cocoa, watch the evening news or maybe something a little more intimate.

7. Start a fight - a play fight that is. Grab a cushion or a pillow or a water gun if you're feeling brave. Playing together will boost your energy levels as well as give you the chance to wrestle on the floor.

8. Set an intimacy goal - if you're serious about getting closer then set yourself a measurable target to reach. Give your relationship an intimacy rating based on how you feel today of between 1 and 10 and then decide where you want to be in 2 weeks, 4 weeks and 10 weeks time.

9. Change your scenery - a relaxing, sensual environment is more likely to make you feel like cuddling up. Light the candles, put on some chill out tunes and serve up some oral delicacies.

10. TALK TO EACH OTHER - intimate relationships are built on a foundation of open, honest and respectful communication. The more we share of ourselves in conversation, the closer we become.