What lubricants should we use for anal sex?

Would occasional anal sex lead to leakage?

Question

My partner and I enjoy a wonderful sex life and have recently tried new things. I suggested anal sex, which she agreed to.

However, I am finding it impossible to penetrate her, even when she is very relaxed. We have yet to try any lubrication and were hoping you could suggest something suitable.

Answer

I 'm a little reluctant to recommend anal intercourse between men and women, simply because it is so often the case that it's the man who wants to do it while the woman isn't very keen.

Also, if anybody gets hurt, it'll be the woman who experiences pain – not the man.

But if your girl friend really does want to go ahead, she will definitely need a lubricant. Vaseline is fine provided you are not using a condom, as it makes little holes in them. Standard sex lubricants like K-Y Jelly, Senselle, Eros, and Wet are perfectly adequate.

All of these are now easily available from sex shops and the mail order firms which advertise in women's magazines. And K-Y is nowadays on open display in pretty well every chemist in the UK.

Final advice: do not press hard – and if she asks you to stop, then stop.

Yours sincerely

Dr David Delvin, GP

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