Dear Anne
I am in my teens and my mom and dad treat me like a kid. I have 3 younger brothers. Believe it or not I don't own a single CD. My clothes are all outdated exept for one or two items. Please help me. I don't know what to do. Sadgal
Dear Optimistic Gal
I'm sorry that you're feeling so hard done by. It's never easy to feel grown up and to be treated like a child. Nor is it easy when friends whose parents have more disposable income can swank around with their fancy clothes and posessions. I've never liked such boastful bigheads but there are plenty of them around. However, the answer lies mostly in your hands.
Firstly, you may have to accept that there's only so much money to go around in your family, and with four children money may well be tight. If so, that'll be stressful for your parents so asking for more may well cause friction. I'm sure there's lots of things your parents would like that they can't afford either. There's also the point that asking for handouts isn't adult behaviour so it may not come across to your parents as a sign of maturity.
So what you could do is negotiate. At a time when both of your parents are around and relaxed, ask calmly if you could do chores to earn extra pocket-money. If that's OK, you'll then have to do the jobs well, willingly and promptly. If there's still no money forthcoming, how about washing neighbours' cars, walking their dogs or mowing their lawns? You may be old enough to get some baby-sitting or deliver newspapers though you might need to check with your Head of Year to see if that's legally OK. If attitude rather than money is the problem you'll need to prove that you're grown up.
Other ways of showing you're mature include helping out cheerfully around the house and with your brothers. And, of course, doing your homework responsibly. This may seem boring but it's true.
I hope that within a few months you've saved up for some nice CDs and clothes. Good luck!
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