Ruby World Cup: fascinating facts

The first weekend of test matches have taken place and all the home nations have played. What has this told us about the tournament? Well ITV's coverage isn't a cringe worthy awful mess as I initially feared and if New Zealand fail to win the whole shebang they deserve to have the word "bottler's" stamped on both their foreheads and passports. Believe me I'd hate to contribute to the monumental rugby egos of the All Blacks and their insufferably smug supporters but it looks like I've no choice other than pronounce them victors in waiting.

Yes, yes the Italians seemed to be collectively stunned by the sight of approaching black shirts and completely failed to compete at the breakdown, but lets not forget that they're a bunch of seasoned battlers which a tradition of competitive set pieces. A world class front row including Martin Castrogiovanni was absolutely demolished, a fact that should make all teams, even South Africa, wary of taking on the scrum of Mr. Hayman and co. And what of the Boks you may ask? Weren't they suitably impressive against a muscular and talented Samoan side? Well the Springboks varied their opening game very well but let's not overlook the Samoans ineptitude at the set piece. Incredible creative talents they may be individually but in terms of organizing a line out they could take lessons from the Old Crescent Under 16s.

The South Sea Islanders may still pose a question or two for England when they meet. I am not an England fan, their ineptitude against a dogged but uncreative US side made me snigger with schadenfreud (so did the Welsh performance against a one dimensional Canada). Les Rosbifs seemed to inflicted with the same problem that affected all the Northern Hemisphere sides (Scotland against Portugal doesn't count) i.e. lack of a plan B. England, France, Wales and especially Ireland often seemed paralyzed by an incapability to change their game plan. Ireland should have picked and drove, France should have brought on Ellisalde earlier and England should have been simply....better.

Quite frankly the phrase 'clutching wildly at straws' comes to mind if you're talking up the performance of Olly Barkley as a positive. Watching Brian Ashton give his post match 'bollocking' on ITV's dressing room camera was embarrassing. He threw near meaningless platitudes at his players who seemed to be on the verge of ignoring him. I worry for poor Brian.

So there you go. You didn't hear it here first: New Zealand to win.

• Bordeaux
• Cardiff
• Edinburgh
• Lens
• Lyon
• Marseilles
• Montpellier
• Nantes
• Paris
• Saint-Denis
• Saint-Etienne
• Toulouse