The Musketeer film review

certificate_PG

THE MUSKETEER

The Musketeer was a surprise hit in America, delighting audiences with its peculiar cocktail of martial arts and courtly love. Peter Hyams's film will not fare so favourably on this side of the Atlantic, especially with the mighty Spider-Man delivering far more spectacular thrills and spills for your hard-earned pound.

After his parents are murdered by the dastardly and sadistic Febre (Tim Roth), young D'Artagnan (Justin Chambers) swears revenge. He schools himself in hand-to-hand combat, and the art of sword fighting, in the hope of one day joining the legendary Musketeers. However, 17th century France is in the throes of political upheaval. The Queen (Catherine Deneuve) fears a Spanish invasion, and has allowed Cardinal Richelieu (Stephen Rea) to build a private army to replace the disgraced Musketeers.

Porthos (Steve Spiers), Athos (Jan Gregor Kremp) and Aramis (Nick Moran) are shadows of their former selves, and drown their sorrows each night in the local taverns. Full of youthful vigour, D'Artagnan revitalises the Musketeers' spirits, and together, the men set out to bring Febre to justice.

En route, the young hero falls in love with the Queen's plucky dresser, Francesca (Mena Suvari). When Febre learns of the burgeoning romance, he decides to fatally wound D'Artagnan by hurting the one thing the boy loves most: the girl.

The Musketeer has plenty of swash but disappointingly little buckle. Director Hyams sucks all of the excitement and tension out of Alexandre Dumas's classic adventure, and drowns the love scenes in sickly sentiment. Chambers looks entirely comfortable with the physical aspects of his central role, but he fails to bring out the personality of his hero. Suvari two is surprisingly two-dimensional, and even veteran screen villains Roth and Rea struggle to put meat on their characters' bones. The juxtaposition of Matrix-style fight sequences and martial arts, in the setting of 17th century France, feels very awkward.

That said, the action set pieces are thrilling, such as D'Artagnan taking on a room full of soldiers whilst balanced on a barrel. Or the intricate final showdown between the young hero and Febre, in a room full of see-sawing ladders.

What goes up, must come down, though, and Musketeer barely reaches the dizzy heights of mediocrity.