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I'm scared of ending up old and lonely

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I'm scared of ending up old and lonelyNext | Prev

I'm scared of ending up old and lonely

I'm 23, finished uni last year, have a good job, sociable and always out having fun but there is just one thing missing in my life.....I've never had a boyfriend. Its recently been making me feel unhappy and if there is something wrong with me but I don't think I'm ugly, I know I'm a fun person with lots of interests and easy to get on with yet I just feel like the forgotten one!!

I fear rejection and so never go up to anybody I like in bars or clubs. If somebody is flirting with me I either don't realise until afterwards or just don't know how to respond. I had been on a date with one guy but was so nervous I ended up being sick in the toilets most of the night. I just feel so unconfident when it comes to relationships and the opposite sex!! Which is not what I am like generally!!

Not really sure what to do. I'm just scared of ending up an old lonely lady with lots of regrets!!!

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Added: 11 November 2009 10:48
Terry says:
Stop trying so hard and don't be concerned,you are still young. It will happen one day,a day you are not expecting it and you will not be sick because you will find you have found that other person and you will feel good in his presence. Mean while go out and enjoy life as it is.
Added: 24 October 2009 18:40
Take it easy says:
23 you shouldnt be worried about things like that till you are twice that age, then you could have been with some one for years and you be on here wishing you stayed on your own.

Maybe a blessing in disguise.

I think your problem is insecurity esp if you feel sick.

If you met someone who you know is going to be understanding to you and on your wave length you insecurity be a thing of the past, you just not met the right one for you yet don't jump in for desperation sake and just take on a wrong one just to prove things to your self.

Added: 11 October 2009 21:12
Mr Richard John Evans says:
I think you should reserve yourself for your self, just a little more. Then train yourself to only go out on sunday afternoons. I too, have never had a girlfriend lately. Same Same. One of my relatives found a man in Washington, u.s.a. A african american man and their married now. She moved back now because she misses her son, too much. She has gone back to see him though. She has married three times now. She has five kids. 2 off the 1st. 2 off the 2nd. 1 off the last boyfriend.
Added: 11 October 2009 21:05
Mr Richard John Evans says:
Hi, I am a student at Yale college, Im in my final years. I heard the other day a old bloke saying on the radio: I feel sorry for you, your on the hormone treadmill. I guess that walking up a steep treadmill might feel like, you do when you get that missed chance time again, or your all talking inside when you want to be talking on the outside. I can't remember the last time someone said no to me, so I don't see what all the worryings about. (don't worry, everything will be alright). It is traditionally the mans job to ask the lady to go out, but being one, I suppose I have heard that, I maybe propositioned by a girl, but only if Im as happy as I can be. Then I might have a chance. I think you try getting some more friends into your current circle of friends. That may bring more male interest your way.
Added: 10 April 2009 13:31
Chris says:
You need to find some kind of therapist or mentor (preferably American) who can teach you some basics of the mating game. You sound great, just that things haven't really gone too well for you yet. Or you can join an on-line dating agency. Your phone won't stop ringing with guys keen to go on a date with you. good luck.
Added: 30 March 2009 21:40
Joe says:
Whats wrong with sad and lonely?
Added: 2 March 2009 16:28
evie says:
i can understand how u feel, when I was young I felt like u then along came my great hubby and we were together a long time till he passed away Yup Im old and but I'm not lonely I make an effort to smile at stangers talk to people, Im alone, but life is how u make it, and its grand, stop trying to read your future no one knows what will happen so that great person could be on the next street, and get out and learn to flirt with those guys who obviously think u r pretty and want to get to know u.so good luck
Added: 14 February 2009 20:53
grandadknows says:
ENDING UP OLD AND LONELY?
No way. You are trying too hard to be someone else. Be your self. Dont go out looking for a relationship but go for a night out and enjoy your life.
There is always someone there for you, I am a great believer in that, and you will find someone. Just dont try too hard, this can lead to you being hurt.
Relax, go out with your mates and give life a chance to deliver someone to you.
Chill.
Stay Happy, Andy xx
Added: 29 January 2009 15:37
Christina says:
You just have to relax and look for friends instead of lovers, you are too young to worry about being old and lonely. I looked after my mother for many years and i am now 56 alone and hoping to find someone to share life with. Go on chat lines and have fun just flirting and with pracice you might gain confidence to chat with men face to face.
Added: 8 August 2008 22:46
Petra says:
Hey at 23 I am having a ball no bloke on the map yet just a whole lot of fun. Been to Uni got myself a job but bored stupid soooooo. I am off to USA next summer for the summer camp I shall be nearly 25 then but who cares. Age is just numbers, don't worry about them they all add up in the end. I know what you mean about not being on the ball when guys chat you up and I put it down to the chat ups not on a level I can comprehend. Get travelling girl Kenya is a right eye opener and it changes the way you think about things. There are plenty of places with CAFOD and others its strange how helping others seems to help us at the same time...but yeah it works think about it.

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